Whale Rider (2002)

Paikea Apirana, also known as Pai, is a twelve year old girl who was born from a long line of a tribe’s chiefly succession and is named after the legendary Paikea, her direct ancestor and the man who was also known for his legacy as a Whale Rider. Despite this, Pai has been shunned by the other members of the tribe and especially her grandfather for being born a girl, making her the breaking point of a line of male descendants which unfortunately also makes her illegible to be the next tribe’s leader.

Paikea Apirana

There is no denying the fact that Pai has been a strong character throughout the entirety of the movie despite being shunned and often put down by people in her tribe, especially her grandfather, for being born a girl and hence not being the “saviour” that they were hoping for. It may be because of this less than happy upbringing that Pai has learned to mature in mind, spirit and emotion, as displayed particularly in one scene whereby Koro had openly called Pai worthless and even demanded her father to take her away. Despite the hurtful words used on someone of such tender and impressionable age, Pai was able to understand and even rationalized that Koro did not mean what he said.

According to Erikson’s Psychosocial Stages of Development, Pai could fall under two categorizations which are Industry vs. Inferiority, and Identity vs. Role Confusion. Illustrating Erikson’s Industry, Pai expressed the need to prove herself worthy of being the next chief by showing that she is as capable as the other boys in the cultural school and maybe even better than them (Santrock, 2011). She was able to master taiaha with a makeshift weapon and defeated a fellow peer, Hemi, who was probably on the top of Koro’s list of potential leader. She also manages to effortlessly retrieve the whale tooth from the ocean, where her other peers have failed, won an interschool speech competition and ultimately, Pai was the only one capable of returning Paikea’s whale and its pod back to sea. It was this final display of industry that finally led Koro to believe and accept Pai as his “Wise Leader”.

He gave her the whale tooth, symbolizing his acceptance as his leader.

Additionally, while proving her worth, Pai is also seen trying to find her place in the community and the role she has to play. Should she obey the demands of the grandfather she loves by just remaining a submissive and loyal female in the tribe as is expected of her, or should she fight to gain the status and respect of a leader that she believes herself to be? During the beginning stages, we see Pai experiencing role confusion in finding her place and value and she struggles to disobey her grandfather, eventually leading her to give up hope that she will truly be accepted and so she decides to leave her home in pursuit of a new life and a new identity (Santrock, 2011). However, she returns home as we see her feeling a strong connection to the sea and the whales which are her identity and her birthright. The movie ends with Pai achieving Ego Identity, which is the achievement of being one’s true self, by being made leader as a result of her determination (Santrock, 2011), values and loyalty to the tribe.

Koro Apirana

According to Erikson’s stages of development, Koro displays the theory of Generativity (Santrock, 2011), in which his main goal was to pass on the legacy and traditions of the tribe to the potential male leaders of the tribe with the ultimate goal of passing on the title of chief to one of them for the development and growth of the next generation. However, when he fails to find “the rightful chief”, he moves on to the next stage of Despair, resigning himself to personal defeat and defeat of his people and for a while, he seems bedridden with despair and frustration and no one’s voice seemed to be able to reach him (Santrock, 2011).

With finally admitting to Pai’s rightfulness as chief, he finally is in peace with himself as he feels that he has accomplished his role as a leader and is satisfied that he has chosen the right successor to bring strength and prosperity to the tribe. He may also feel at peace for finally being able to integrate his love for Pai and his duties as a chief, which were originally in dissonance with each other and we can say that he achieved Ego Integrity (Santrock, 2011).

Santrock, J. W. (2011). Life-span Development (13th ed.). New York: McGraw-Hill. 

Forget Paris (1995)

Forget Paris is the story that tells us what really happens after a “Happily Ever After”. Mickey and Ellen who met in the most unusual of situations and fell in love on the streets of Paris, suddenly find themselves faced with the reality of life and the reality of each other once the honeymoon phase of their relationship is over. We as the audience can truly appreciate the honesty and the raw truth that is involved in loving someone, so intelligently portrayed in the hilarious and sometimes heartbreaking events that take place in Mickey and Ellen’s lives and leaving us to question, “Will they find their happily ever after once again?”

The "We" and "I" in a Relationship

One of the components of intimacy is mutuality in which intimate partners think of themselves as a couple instead of two separate human beings and the key to such relationship is when both partners provide mutual love, trust, support, and benefit; they also start referring to themselves as “we” instead of “I”. This mutuality or connectedness is one of the means to establish an increasingly mature and mutually rewarding interpersonal relationship, in which both partners are able to provide a safe and supportive anchor for each other, to be attentive to their partner and their needs, and to demonstrate empathy and responsiveness (Snir & Wiseman, 2013).

That being said, maintaining one’s own individuality while being in a relationship is often disregarded for the sake of placing priority on the relationship as a couple. However, Snir and Wiseman (2013) postulated that achieving individuality allows one to participate in a mature couple relationship without feeling that one's boundaries or even existence as a separate human being are being threatened, and does not have an unhealthy dependency towards one’s partner. At the same time, the individual is able to maintain a sense of autonomy and continue to experience self-growth and development.

Ellen was too dependent and Mickey was too independent?

“When he travels, not only am I lonely but I don’t know who I am by myself.....  If I took time, before or between, to find out who I really am by myself, who I can be without any guy around... I know I’m in there somewhere. I can hear myself screaming from a distance.” (Ellen Gordon)

Kudos to Ellen for leaving her marriage, her job, her home in Paris... basically her whole life in pursuit of her love for Mickey, but was it really the wisest thing to do? While her sacrifice is commendable, I feel that she had also given up her own identity. Pretty quickly, we see how lost and miserable Ellen was and although understandable with her being in a new environment, we should note how happy and whole she feels when Mickey returns. Personally, while it is good for a couple to be dependent on each other, I feel that it is not as healthy when they are not independent individually.

As Ellen herself even briefly considered if she married Mickey out of a rebound, it is something that was very likely to have happened. She even said, “When my first husband left me, I felt so lost... He (Mickey) was what I needed to get through that” making us believe that she may have jumped into the relationship with Mickey thinking that he could fill the void for her and complete her. With his continuous absence, Ellen finds that being in a relationship with Mickey was not enough to make her feel happy and satisfied with her life.

“I love being a referee. It’s a big part of who I am and I’m starting to miss me..... It’s important to us. I want to love you and not resent you.” (Mickey Gordon)

In the case of Mickey, he struggles to give Ellen the life that she wants especially when it came at the expense of his own happiness. She wants him to be around as she tells him, “I did not leave France to be alone.” and so listening to her doubts and fears, he gives up his own home, job and lifestyle to bring her happiness and he even accommodates to let her sick father to live with them.

However, he soon realizes that he is unhappy and it makes him more irritable and moody, even to the point of crying when the toothpaste ran out. He told his friend Jack that, “I’m not used to someone else having an opinion about my life” and after taking his friend’s advice, he returns to his old job as a referee for the National Basketball Association. For a while, things start to improve for Mickey and Ellen once they learned to compromise to each other’s needs and for a brief period of time, we even see them working together towards the same goal, which was to have a baby. Unfortunately, they could not conceive a child, and once again losing a shared goal and interest, they reverted back to being separate individuals in a relationship.

Towards the end, Ellen finally finds her own independence and perceiving the relationship as not rewarding anymore, or as something that she needed to depend on, Ellen decides to go back to Paris to live her own life. Ellen moves to Paris and Mickey continues on with his job, but neither finding satisfaction in this new arrangement, they get back together again because despite their individual differences and goals, they still loved and cared for each other.  

In conclusion...

There should be a balance in satisfying the needs of the relationship and needs of the individual. Every relationship calls for compromises and changes. That being said, compromises should be equal on both sides, and if it is considered too much or unfair, it is alright to say "no" and stand your ground, followed by further communications of how to make the relationship work for both individuals. 

Brown, N. M., & Amatea, E. S. (2013). Love and intimate relationships: Journeys of the heart. Philadelphia: Taylor & Francis Group.

Snir, S., & Wiseman, H. (2013). Relationship patterns of connectedness and individuality in couples as expressed in the couple joint drawing method. The Arts in Psychotherapy, 40501-508. doi:10.1016/j.aip.2013.07.005

Strictly Ballroom (1992)

The theme repetitively presented in this movie is to not live in fear. While seemingly a simple notion, the fear in question, which is the fear of not conforming to social standards, is not easy for most of us to overcome.  As social creatures, every single one of us are part of many in-groups, such as race, religion, occupation and in order to maintain a positive self concept within the group, we are often pressured to follow along the norms and beliefs that exists within that in-group (Rodriguez, 2016).

Throughout the movie, we the audience can clearly see the influence of Barry Fife, president of the Australian Dancing Federation, on all the other ballroom dancers in this movie and it is evident how most of the characters conformed, complied and obeyed the specific set of rules set on “the right way to dance”. However in this post, I would like to address why the main character, Scott Hastings, did not follow along with the rules, broke free to dance his own “non-federation” steps, and how that impacted him and others around him.

He danced to his own rhythm because...

His motivation to dance was purely intrinsic

Over and over again, Scott was reminded that the only way to win the Pan Pacific Grand Prix would be to follow to the strictly ballroom steps and patterns and it was beyond their understanding when Scott repeatedly denied wanting to win the trophy that he had been training for since he was six years old. He just wanted to dance and enjoy it for what it is, an expression of himself.

He had Social Support

In one variation on Asch's study of conformity, it was found that participants are less likely to conform to the majority when they find a partner with similar views and answers (Morris & Miller, 1975). Likewise, Scott battles with himself throughout the majority of the film of whether to follow what he believes in or whether to give in to the persuasions and pressure of basically every ballroom dancer in the movie, including his mother and Les Kendall; however, with his unlikely friendship, and later romance, with beginner dancer Fran, he finds more courage to dance freely because she understands how he feels and she encourages his behaviour and need to break free with the quote, " Vivir con miedo, es como vivir a medias (to live in fear is a life half lived)". Along the way, Scott finds more support in Fran's father and grandmother who proceed to teach him the true paso doble and to dance to the rhythm in his heart as well as support him and Fran in the final competition.  

As a result...

He achieved self-actualization

One of the characteristic of a self-actualized individual, as determined by Abraham Maslow and Carl Rogers, is achieved when an individual is resistant to enculturation, with a sense of autonomy found in people who are motivated to do more than adjust to and go along with their social in-groups (Whitson, 2016). 

Scott made his final stand in the end when he, through the paso doble, publicly denounces his role of a rule-following ballroom dancer and displays his love and pure joy to dance. As a self-actualized individual, Scott develops a greater acceptance of his values and of his identity, as well as trusting in his internal instincts of what is right and wrong and transcending the social expectations of him to win the championship (Whitson, 2016). 

Barriers are broken

In the end, Scott and Fran together destroyed the entire regime that is the Pan Pacific Grand Prix and Dance Federation by giving a stellar non-federation paso doble performance, and this is symbolized by the shot of Barry Fife falling with the trophies, representing the downfall of the strictly ballroom regulations and a break to freedom of expression. 

Dancing has finally been accepted for what it is, an art of expression and something that can not be controlled. The very thing that the Grand Prix existed for, which is to award champions, has been forgotten when everyone in the room enters the dance floor and dance to "Love is in the Air". Finally, I find that this final scene also represents the breaking of the in-group, out-group social barriers between dancers and non-dancers, and beginner and open amateur as everyone is allowed to dance and it is fine if you do not do it the "right way".

Morris, W. N., & Miller, R. S. (1975). The effects of consensus-breaking and consensus-preempting partners on reduction of conformity. Journal Of Experimental Social Psychology, 11(3), 215-223. doi:10.1016/S0022-1031(75)80023-0

Rodriguez, J. (2016). Social identity theory. Salem Press Encyclopedia Of Health.

Whitson, E. R. (2016). Self-actualization. Salem Press Encyclopedia Of Health,

Eat Drink Man Woman (1994)

Eat, Drink, Man, Woman (1994), a family dramedy directed by Ang Lee, centres on the lives of the Chu family and begins with Master Chef Chu cooking a Sunday dinner for his three unmarried daughters Jia Jen, Jia Chien, and Jia Ning. While the movie does show us the everyday lives of the Chu family, much focus was given to the elaborate preparations of the Sunday dinner feasts, and we as the audience begin to look forward to the Sunday dinner ritual which reveals to be the setting for the revealing of many hilarious and unexpected announcements that would ultimately change their lives and interactions as a family.  

Oh, the horror.

Ang Lee’s portrayal of the family and his manner of storytelling is unique and ingenious as audiences were left undoubtedly in shock and amazement by the end of the film. After watching the movie the second time, I could not help but applaud the tiny hints and clues heralding the build up of the ultimate plot twist, that while is relatively obvious, was easily looked over the first time. However, his brilliance does not end there. Sparsely scattered throughout the film were little scenes that while seemingly irrelevant to the plot, feeds an unconscious message to the minds of the audience and in this blog, I am going to address a couple of symbolisms in the film that I found.

To Adorn and Enrich: Symbolisms 

Moving Traffic

Intriguingly, the movie starts with a scene of moving traffic. I believe that the moving traffic is worth noticing as scenes of traffic plays in different variations throughout the movie, the last couple of times even including the almost graceful motions of a traffic conductor.

Life is almost like traffic; sometimes, it goes on smoothly, sometimes we have to stop and sometimes we have to slow down. But in terms of this movie, in which each member of the Chu family suddenly faces many challenges and changes in their lives, such as a failed investment, marriages, pregnancy, a death of a family friend and loss of a family home, the few traffic scenes that are shown after some of these novel moments could probably be a reminder that even when things seem in chaos and ruins and out of our control, life around us still carries on.

Another thing to take note on is the appearance of the traffic conductor in the second half of the movie. In the initial scenes, the drivers on the road moved according to their judgments and was slightly chaotic and maybe a little dangerous. Even as we find the conductor’s motions to be calming to watch and that traffic is running more smoothly and orderly, it may symbolize how each member of the Chu family come into their own and find the direction and order that was previously missing in their lives. It gives us a sense of comfort that we may be able to take control of our own lives and choose our own happiness.

Food, Glorious Food

The title of the movie is based on the Confucius teaching that basic human desires such as food and sex are natural and should be accepted, but as we learn early on, food is not just sustenance for this family. It symbolizes much more than that, and it affirms what we already know- that it is not enough to just attain our basic human desires, but of achieving happiness in the bonds we form and how we connect to each other as humans.

It was evident that the Chu family hardly had any good communication and the Sunday dinners were often awkward and strained, yet it was their means of communicating with each other and the period in which each member made announcements. More so for Master Chu, who claimed that he did not understand his daughters and refused any help from them, cooking was a way for him to express his love. 

I believe that it is common for Asian families to not be overly vocal in their affections but in their actions instead. This also seen in his new habit of cooking meals for Shan Shan and maybe even suffering through the meals prepared by Jin Rong; albeit mistakenly perceived as fatherly and grandfatherly love, it was still an obvious expression of his affections for them.

Sense of Taste: Twas Lost and Now is Found

The last thing I would like to highlight is Master Chu’s loss of his sense of taste. He continues to cook but we have hardly notice any daughter complimenting his meals; thus possibly a reason for his loss of sense of taste as he may feel that his love was not recognized and accepted and so there is no longer a point to it and loses the enjoyment of it altogether.

In the final scene in which Jia Chien serves her father an elaborate meal, Master Chu drinks her soup and after complimenting it, gently critiques her soup which led to a short, fiery argument between father and daughter when he comes to a remarkable realization- he could taste her soup. It may be due to the fact that the recipe was that of his late wife, reminding him of his first love, made even more profound by the fact that Jia Chien carries a strong resemblance to her mother in both looks and personality.

Reverently asking for more soup and happily obliging, the very last scene captures a rare moment between Master Chu and his second daughter. I believe that his regaining of taste symbolized his recognition of his daughter’s love and loyalty to him. He has honoured her culinary skills and she achieves a sense of fulfillment in her father’s recognition, respect and love.